this time baby, i'll be.....eccentric.

this picture basically sums up an everyday outfit for me. loose shirt (with a usual, but possible cardigan), tight pants, simple shoes, and big hair. once again proving that my edie obsession is alive and well, lets get going..

life is fabulous at the moment. i am continuing to be the eccentric friend you all know and love. spending way to much on clothes, coffees, and getting out to party as much as i can. i really am excited for college and cant wait to be in des moines. i went to orientation this past weekend with my mother, and had THE MOST fun i have had in a long time. i couldn't even remember the last time i really laughed that hard. i met tons of people and this all proved to me that i was ready to go. ready to take theater seriously, and get my ass kicked in some dance classes. [sidebar...i met a fabulous individual at drake orientation..he loves lady gaga as much, if not more than i do. he sang bad romance at the karaoke party and me and about 4-5 people did the dance in the background. made sure to make a fool of myself right away. i am in theater after all..] many more funny stories to be told about orientation, but too many to list them all here. call me or ask me the next time we spend time together to find out. there are some doozies.

mother was up from san antonio last week. it was wonderful to see her and know that we are right where we should be. arguing. she loved drake and is ready for me to venture off to the next part of life. i have been told lately, a lot, that i am adam lambert, a model and eccentric (heard the MOST often) and i just feel really great. its an accomplishment to be finished with high school, especially coming from the person who thought their D+ in German and multiple Cs in math would keep them from going to a good school. i have never been more excited about going somewhere in my whole life, can't wait to emerse myself into a world of passionate, crazy people. and honestly REALLY put some effort into my craft. i have so much to learn and am so excited to do it. break me down and build me back up.

there are so many people to see before summer ends. so many places to go. so much money to save [and spend]. and not near enough time. i want the time to stay. but i want it to go at the same time.

i promised my dear friend linnea that i would blog more now that i have time. and expect the same from her. more people should do this. in her words, "its such therapy." and in mine "you really feel like carrie bradshaw."

love you all.

xo:mwah. kyle

my fascination for edie sedgwick grows with every passing day. i continue to learn more about her and become more entranced, confused, bewildered and ultimately saddened by her story. i was out for coffee with my dear friend linnea yesterday. i told her she had a qualities just like edie's: long legs, skinny, with a fashion sense, big beautiful eyes and a pretty face. linnea is reading this and cringing at all the compliments i just gave her. suck it up linnea, because you deserve EVERY one. it was marvelous to catch up with her yesterday, even if only for an hour. we are those two people who can fill up a time together, after months of not seeing eachother, and its like not a moment has passed.

well, i had said that my biographic blog post was coming, and as i lay here in Edina at my aunts house, im feeling that the time has come.

okay, well rewinding for awhile...i just want to re-emphasize what an amazing year this has been for me. filled with new friends, fashion, moves, recording studios, and more fabulous opportunities than an 18 year old from Minnesota should be entitled to. my singer actor class in the cities has given me more connections than i can even comprehend sometimes. i went to a play last night and knew over half the cast, just because i've performed with them at one time or another, or i had met them. so interesting. prelude got me into a recording studio this year, which still feels surreal to me. i got accepted into my top choice school, and they gave me lots of money. that being said, money is still a major concern for me, as my shopping habits will have to be greatly decreased and i will have to grow up and stop living in my fantasy land. but my excitement and readiness to leave this place is so great, that nothing else surpasses it. drake is the perfect fit and the experiences that await me there, i cant even begin to explain.

these past months have been filled with coffee, shopping, fashion shows, models, singers, dancers, actors and a workshop at the minnesota opera. i died when i got invited to do that. i feel like im in a dream most of the time. still waiting for someone to pinch me and tell me that all of this isnt happening. im also beginning to reach a point where i'm comfortable with myself again. after having mom take off with the kids for san antonio and having to move in with dad, i felt a feeling of upheaval (which is not foreign for me at all, but a feeling that had been repressed for awhile. i had to adapt to another house, another set of rules, another set of ideas. we are all starting to get used to each other and the way we live. i am trying to be less critical of myself and of those around me. i feel better than i have for a long time, so hopefully its working.

im sure i've forgotten something, but i will write again soon. uptown calls :]

thanks for reading my scrambled thoughts loves.

xo:mwah. kyle

ohh teenage hopes, arrive at your door. left you with nothing, and they want some more...

i'm contemplating buying this print. to put it in my room at home and eventually at college. its beautiful, its in support of minneapolis artists, and its twiggy. :]

i continually make efforts in attempts to write about all thats been happening lately (and thats A LOT) but i seem to continually do it at the in opportune moment. i promise, soon i will sit and write for hours about my crazy life. not like anybodys really interested anyway, but it would be good to write down and document. get ready for a MOTHER of a blog post.

i am so tired.

xo:mwah. kyle.

"poor old cat. poor slob. poor slob without a name..." - Holly Golightly

im going to watch this tonight :]

i have like two seconds to jot something down. i promise i will do a EPIC biography length post to catch up on my rapid life very soon.

i had to share a conversation that i had with my mother this morning on the telephone.

i told her some of the big news in my life (i get to workshop a show next week @ the MOC and see a fashion show tonight), to which she responded:

Mother: Kyle, you seem to be leading a very cosmopolitan life

Me: I know. I kindof feel like Carrie Bradshaw on Sex and the City

made my life :] xo:mwah, talk to you staunch characters soon...

but the time has come, to move along...

timely enough, the lyrics from the KT Tunstall song "Other Side of The World" came on in time for this blog post (ie. that's what the post title is from). after months of heavy subject matter and stresses in my life, the fog is finally starting to lift and it is time for a new beginning.

my mother and i decided this morning that it is time for us to part ways, and for me to go live permanently with my dad until i go off to college. i had been thinking a lot about this personally, for quite awhile, but the conversation this morning put a lot of personal thoughts out in the open. "its time for the Kyle and Mom show to end.." she said. "It's just time." we both have to think of whats best for us as individuals. i need to be in a focus driven environment, where i can enjoy my senior year and have people to enjoy it with me. she needs to focus on the renewal of life for her family, which for the time being i will detach from for a while. we talked about how our new home had become a toxic place, with no real positive memories formed in it. i only remember the negative memories from this house, because thats all i've had to live with for the past months. its also very hard for me to watch her and drew so upset. so, this is for them as much as it is for me. we all need to move on and reach a new sense of grounding somewhere else.

its so nice to finally feel like your seeing clearly again. i've been in a metaphoric fog for such a long time and it shows in my face, body and words lately. i've been breaking out more than usual (which is VERY uncommon for me), i look tired constantly, and am either not eating or binge eating (which needs to find a medium somwhere). i also feel like i've lost connection with many people, because i tend to put up my wall when stuff like this happens. but it finally feels like kyle is coming back, and the sun will be shining soon.

as they sing in our latest prelude song from "In The Heights"......

just. breathe.

xo:mwah. kyle.

for linnea.

to my insightful friend. who has had those late night, novel long text or facebook conversations on the difficulties of life...

i love you. i can't wait to see your name on the pages of my monthly vogues.

come home to me, so we can watch movies, discuss fashion, shop with no money and go get coffees :]

xo:mwah. your friend, kyle.

"if the whole world had the lighting of a well lit restaurant bathroom, it would be a much better place"

okay, well after the epitome of a week from hell, i have finally reached a point where i feel i am beginning to regain touch with humanity. i completely shut myself out from stress and overwork. this is what my life will be like once in the theater world, so i better get used to it. lets enjoy the moments of solitude while we can, and i'll get you up to speed on my crazy life.

the picture above is from the movie 'An Education' starring a host of wonderful people, including the fabulously talented Carey Mulligan [dating shia lebouf]....i saw this movie last saturday after a day of dancing for show choir. it was one of those fabulous Minneapolis evenings where you spend way to much money on dinner and go to a small inexpensive movie theater where you can buy a ticket and snacks for the price of a ticket at a snooty movie theater. i went with my friend, the lovely and talented Laryssa Shoeck, and we discussed life in all its highs and lows. we are both working on choosing the school that will nurture our love for performing, so we had quite a long discussion....and a VERY expensive tab at the end of dinner (for two 18 year olds anyway).

so, this week....my parents and the kids were out of town in san antonio...and to my surprise, i was rarely home to enjoy the solitude....because of all the chaos that is my life these days. the week began with tryouts for the spring show, everybody loves opal. its an adorably, inappropriate show about a gang of con-artists running from the law. they end up living with an old recluse, living in a depleting mansion, on the edge of a dump (GREY GARDENS!!!!! hahahah)....they try to kill her for her insurance throughout most of the play, and end up falling in love with this lovable, old woman. i get to be a fat, balding con-man with a brooklyn accent...what could be more fun i ask you? Wednesday was our first rehearsal. Thursday we had sections for one act....got 2nd. we were professional at the competition about it, but needless to say...when we got on the bus the gloves came off. we had a wonderful show this year, and i think our whole little "family" was sad to see it end and have the knowledge that we wouldn't be going to state. Friday we got to work with the amazing Morten Lauridson. he is world renowned and i so loved working with him. it was an amazing experience...i just don't think a lot of people in our choir grasped the honor that came with being invited to that. its a big deal when a choir from the "boonies" is invited to perform with the big league city schools...and i could see our choir directors irritation with some of the students who really didn't get the gravity of the situation. anyway, i wont dwell....saturday was the all day emotion rehearsal...i will say that i honestly think that if i wasn't taking a gym class, that day could have had dire consequences for my body :P i drove with leah and brit to drake on sunday....we stopped and had mcdonalds and cold stone (which all of us HEAVILY regretted later, too much grease and sugar for a long car ride in the snow). i had my audition this morning....i don't know exactly how i felt about it. it seemed sub-par due to the mass chaos of my life right now, which is a disappointment....but i suppose thats all i can do at this point. i hope my love for theater shone through...because as i sit here at the drake starbucks watching the snow fall, and completely enjoying the fact that i don't HAVE to worry about anything until i get home tomorrow night, this IS where i belong.

i took a nap for the first time in months today. i enjoyed it more than words can express. its great regaining touch with reality. remembering that the world isn't really that bad after all.

night lovelies. enjoy the snow. talk to you soon :]

xo:mwah. kyle.